


Slap That Chicken!

by MJ_Torchwood



Category: Avengers (Comics), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-02
Updated: 2019-03-02
Packaged: 2019-11-07 19:47:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17966891
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MJ_Torchwood/pseuds/MJ_Torchwood
Summary: How hard do you have to slap a chicken to cook it?





	Slap That Chicken!

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by the memes about how hard you would need to slap a chicken in order to cook it with one slap. Also, this is my first fanfiction, so be gentle in your comments.

Bucky walked into the lab. "Alright, Stark. What is so damn important that you needed me to come down here _right now_?"

 

"I'm sorry, did I interrupt you while you were watching Wheel of Fortune?" came the (decidedly not sorry-sounding) reply. Tony pointed to a raw, whole chicken sitting on the lab table in front of him. There were various sensors and cameras aimed at it. "I need you to slap this baby as hard as you can with Lucky Lefty." He was wearing what Bucky privately called his _I'm doing science that will likely explode_ grin.

 

"Ignoring for the moment what you just called my arm," _because I can only deal with so much insanity at the moment_ "you called me down here just to punch a chicken?" Idly, Bucky wondered if all the chemicals Stack worked with had finally rotted his brain. _Bound to happen someday._

 

"Not punch. Slap. As hard as you can," Tony replied, demonstrating the movement with his hand. It looked strangely like a dance move he had seen young people do, all the stranger now because a: Stark was doing it, and b: it was aimed at a chicken.

 

"Slap, punch, whatever. That still doesn't answer my main question: Why?"

 

Bruce stuck his head out from behind a protective wall. "For science!" Bucky raised an eyebrow. "There's a basic scientific principle that kinetic energy, movement, is converted into thermal energy, heat," Bruce clarified, watching Bucky's face in an attempt to gauge understanding. "So, it stands to reason that, if this chicken is hit with enough force, that the slap could cook it." Bruce glanced at Tony and they shared a grin. _Oh, no. That grin._

 

Bucky pinched the bridge of his nose with his flesh hand. Great, now there were _two_ mad scientists in the tower, and they were joining forces. A saying from Clint popped into his head: _This is why we can't have nice things._

 

Unnoticed, DUM-E grabbed the fire extinguisher in what might be construed as an excited manner.


End file.
